Monthly Archives: October 2018

IS LOVE EVER EQUAL?

 

I love it when my boyfriend calls me “baby” and have wondered for years why we use that word especially while “making love.” ┬áRemember the given “respect your elders” no matter what; yet they haven’t respected children with the often said, “children are to be seen and not heard?”

Presently, minorities are demanding equality whether they are people of color disenfranchised from the right to vote, or women getting equal pay for equal work that men do, or children not to be bullied by parents, teachers and therefore by other children.

For many years, it’s been acceptable for men to marry women much younger than themselves like my first husband’s grandma marrying a man 25 years younger than her, he 43 and she 18. I remember her telling me, “He was the love of my life!” She never remarried after he died in his 80s.

My boyfriend is forty plus years younger than me and its caused an incomprehension and fear with his understandably concerned parents: “Aren’t you blocking your future?”

Antoine and I met in a bar where he was playing darts and I was dancing east coast swing. I got in his way which prompted him to ask me if I wanted to play.

“I’ve never really played, but I’ll give it a whirl.”

After never hitting the bull’s eye, I ask if he’d like to dance.

“I’ve never danced in my life,” Antoine replies.

“Want to give it a try?”

Surprisingly, without any persuasion, he walks to the dance floor and learns to lead me with ease. I am amazed…as we both are, that we’ve fallen in love. Even more amazing is that he is 25, and I’ve been privileged to celebrate his virginity. Be the first girl he has kissed. ( He’d tried once with another girl but she didn’t let him.)

Whose to say we should be equal in age? We’ve talked openly about the inevitable leaving of me to find a younger partner.

But for now, nothing equals the IN LOVE relationship we’ve enjoyed for 6 months, which continues to become closer to a bull’s eye of truer and deeper love. After four marriages, he’s the best love I have ever known.